experience, the best birth control

Time to pick up a few back-logged events… Over Christmas, Rhiannon and I got to meet the newest addition to her family, Jacoby. It was really us meeting him – he seemed a little quite and reserved. Not really too talkative, although he did take the opportunity to drool all over me night when I was holding him. The closest thing I can describe it as is carrying around a heavy, chunky sponge that will slowly leak on you.

A sponge with eyes. But a cute sponge – if sponges can in fact be cute.

Chunk The camera goes the other way 

Of course, Grace is still around as well. Considering she has a little over 2 years on her little brother, he weighs almost as much as she does. And that was three months ago – I hate to think about now.

One evening I was holding Jacoby and someone from Rhiannon’s family asked if we were going to have kids anytime soon.

Let me tell you a little story about kids.

Speaking more from observation than experience, when you have two children under the age of three, you tend to try and do as much with them at the same time as possible. This includes bathing. Bath time to a 2 year old in the right mood is pretty much one big party with splashing and giggling and squealing and running naked into the living room yelling “Coby pooped! In the TUB!”

And then after looking around to make sure everyone is indeed looking at her, she finished with a big, “I’M NEKKID!!”

After the bath water had been drained and refilled and everyone was back in and getting re-cleaned, I stopped in to see how things were going. I mean, it should have been safe at this point. And as I’m sitting beside the tub talking with Grace, a murky brown cloud starts spreading toward her. She looked down at the water, at me, at the water, back at me, and then we were both looking down at brown water and I had a dripping wet toddler clinging to my neck, chanting “I’m safe, I’m safe.”

She turned to the doorway and announced to everyone “Coby pooped in the tub! AGAIN!!” She turned back to her brother with a look of despair, as if he had really let her down this time. “Bad Coby. That’s dirty.” And he smiled. We got Grace wrapped in a towel, and as she cleaned shit off of the tub, the towels, Coby, and herself, Lynn looked at me and asked didn’t that just make me want to have kids.


That was pretty much my reaction, too. Thank you, I think I’ll let that joyful experience wait just a little bit. I do well enough to keep up with my own life, thank you very much. At the end of the day, I’m tired enough for one person, much less two.

Tuckered Out