When You Think, Gee, That Would Be Nice To Have, Don’t Get It - Someone Already Did

Once upon there was a family. In this family there were lots of kids. Some of these kids were even married, adding more kids to the family. As all of the kids got older, they decided that they would all go in on a Christmas present for their mom. Their mom, who would cook all the time for this large family, was in desperate need of a good KitchenAid mixer. So they put their heads together and thought and thought and came up with a good idea for a present – a KitchenAid mixer. (Did I mention these children were exceptionally bright?)

A few weeks before Christmas, the mixer was purchased and wrapped and sitting securely in the oldest sibling’s house. And everything was fantastic. For a large present like a mixer, the kids even let their dad be part of the plan. And then the almost unthinkable but strangely logical had happened: their dad called and said Mom had just bought herself a KitchenAid mixer. Christmas season was nearing and she had holiday baking to do. She had talked about getting a mixer for so long, she finally went out and did it. And she got the top-of-the-line-comes-with-all-the-doo-dads type mixer too, which made her happy, so the kids couldn’t complain. Too much. So they got her a teapot, which they would use when they visited. It worked out for everyone, and Mom was told not to buy things for herself before Christmas ever again.

Sometime over the course of the following year, the children once again started their plotting and planning for the following Christmas present. This time they were determined to find the perfect gift, so they started early. Many phone calls and shopping trips to check out merchandise ensued, and finally it was agreed upon that they would get a Belgian waffle maker. And oh the rejoicing and waffles there would be on that joyous Christmas morn.

So in early September, using a coupon and sale, a waffle maker was purchased and put into storage to await its gallant entry at the end of the year. And everything was good. And then the almost unthinkable and really not even remotely logical thing happened: the middle sibling called the older siblings (who have moved out of the house) with the news that their mom just returned from a day of shopping with a Belgian waffle maker tucked securely amongst her purchases. And after a quick inspection of the boxes, it was determined that it was in fact the exact same waffle maker that had already been purchased as a gift.

Oh the horror! Oh the gnashing of teeth of that ensued! Oh the tears that were shed. (They had a good laugh about the whole thing too.) It was decided that a waffle maker Mom wanted, and waffle maker she was going to get. So the present was wrapped and packed and carefully hidden away until Christmas morning.

And then it came time to open the present. The room fell silent with anticipation. And the youngest brother, forgetting what was in the box, said, “Hey Mom, that box is about the same size as your waffle maker over there.”

And if eyes could shoot lasers, that brother would be in several small pieces today. And their mom opened the present to discover the waffle maker and was soon informed that if she pulled the same stunt next year, we were all calling off Christmas. But then she made waffles and was forgiven.

For now, at least, everyone lives happily ever after. Wait until she sees what we’re planning for next year. She’s never going to get this one right.